VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
I puked a lego.
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
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