Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
