I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize
