I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
They are going to name an STD after you.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
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