Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
Just high enough for therapy.
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
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