He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
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