the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
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i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
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I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
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