I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize