So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
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