I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
Randomize