I was to big spoon the shit out of you right now
I'm so hungover and dru,k
that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
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