On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
oh god the rape fog is back!
Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
No stitches, just platelets and will power
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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