Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

(818): View more from California

I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight

Fav 1 856 2004
share tweet
(630): View more from Illinois

I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...

Fav 22 3193 818
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(403): View more from Alberta, CA

SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)

Fav 15 6247 918
share tweet
(860): View more from Connecticut

I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist

Fav 16 1760 4491
share tweet
27 Unforgettable Hookup Texts
Read it at the TFLN blog
(719): View more from Colorado

I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.

Fav 16 5664 1830
share tweet
(562): View more from California

Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics

Fav 16 4563 1146
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(910): View more from North Carolina

shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.

Fav 2 1669 2588
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(732): View more from New Jersey

So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.

Fav 8 717 1134
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(773): View more from Illinois

We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.

Fav 2 130 109
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT