Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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