margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Hey man sorry I got all grabby
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Randomize
