butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
Randomize
