Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (205): View more from Alabama

  at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.

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  (205): at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me. http://tfl.nu/ujwu
  Replies (21) Good night (3060) Bad night (1021)
• Favorite

  (770): View more from Georgia

  If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.

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  (770): If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day. http://tfl.nu/zol0
  Replies (37) Good night (3998) Bad night (610)
• Favorite

  (810): View more from Michigan

  Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.

  (1-810): View more from Michigan

  Thanks dad.

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  (810): Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game. (1-810): Thanks dad. http://tfl.nu/ga57
  Replies (24) Good night (1078) Bad night (4617)
• Favorite

  (816): View more from Missouri

  Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.

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  (816): Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete. http://tfl.nu/oev7
  Replies (20) Good night (4106) Bad night (1430)
• Favorite

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.

  (1-612): View more from Minnesota

  Or a large amount of condoms?!?

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  (612): If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation. (1-612): Or a large amount of condoms?!? http://tfl.nu/muu8
  Replies (12) Good night (6378) Bad night (1090)
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.

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  (540): It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic. http://tfl.nu/37md
  Replies (5) Good night (956) Bad night (2696)
• Favorite

  (530): View more from California

  I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me

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  (530): I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me http://tfl.nu/rrqt
  Replies (23) Good night (6618) Bad night (1124)
• Favorite

  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found

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  (405): I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found http://tfl.nu/l324
  Replies (7) Good night (2718) Bad night (1220)
• Favorite

  (774): View more from Massachusetts

  My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am

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  (774): My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am http://tfl.nu/yrwz
  Replies (8) Good night (966) Bad night (1634)
• Favorite

  (775): View more from Nevada

  I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing

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  (775): I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing http://tfl.nu/nqjl
  Replies (6) Good night (1014) Bad night (461)
• Favorite

  (830): View more from Texas

  Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.

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  (830): Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point. http://tfl.nu/e159
  Replies (13) Good night (576) Bad night (1293)
• Favorite

  (419): View more from Ohio

  Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.

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  (419): Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me. http://tfl.nu/g7iq
  Replies (10) Good night (1126) Bad night (427)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  You are a booty call, not a friend.

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  (314): You are a booty call, not a friend. http://tfl.nu/bgd1
  Replies (9) Good night (1473) Bad night (1428)
• Favorite

  (812): View more from Indiana

  Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.

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  (812): Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible. http://tfl.nu/givh
  Replies (3) Good night (413) Bad night (718)
• Favorite

  (315): View more from New York

  she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war

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  (315): she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war http://tfl.nu/uvwx
  Replies (4) Good night (372) Bad night (465)

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