I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
bring money and cleavage
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
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