is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
