I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Randomize
