i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
Randomize
