it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
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