My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize
