I bet he comes in French.
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
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