I feel like I'm in dance class right now
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
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