Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
Randomize
