I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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