We won't sleep together?
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Randomize
