waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
The air was thick with penises
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
I believe in your delicious
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