i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
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