The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Randomize