Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
I have fence marks all over my body
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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