I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
Randomize