Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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