with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
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