forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
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i cant cry in cvs. not again.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
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In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
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