i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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