and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
