Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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