so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
Randomize
