We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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