VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
Randomize
