mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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