I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Randomize