thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
