this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Randomize