Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
Randomize
