Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
Based on my calculations, I should be blackout by approximately 11:14pm and that's when I need you to take my phone away from me. Mkay?
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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