I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
I got her a Nickelback box set.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
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