He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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