I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Randomize
